By SAMUEL TORRES
Staff Writer
My life has gotten nowhere over the last 17 years. I was already a senior with nothing but myself, no lover, no friends, no siblings, and no parents. I was born in the snowy winter of December. It was the day before Christmas when my mother was rushed to the hospital to only die right after birthing me. When my father had heard this he already suffered from fatal heart attacks so his heart was already damaged enough, he had gone into the room where her lifeless body lay. He dragged a chair closer to the bed and then sat down placing his hand over hers, the pain in his eyes was visible as they were already in tears; he held her hand tightly then later on that night he died from Takotsubo cardiomyopathy which the doctors explained as a heartache. A homeless and parentless child, the doctors had kept me in the hospital motoring me for any signs of failures of some sort; however, when I reached closer to the age of one they transferred me to an orphanage where I had grown up all my life. The orphanage was a simple blue-and-white house that only stretched 42 feet and was 10 meters tall; the kids who had lived there were already the age of 10 a few lower. There were only around 10 kids who were already turning 16 but they had eventually left on their own somewhere, nobody knows where, it was mainly those who were younger that got adopted since most families wanted a kid instead.
“Have they given him a name yet?” I was passed from the arms of a nurse who brought me to the orphanage to the owner, who was a lady around her 30s with short black hair and pale white skin.
“No, they haven’t, his parents died after his birth so they never got a chance.” The nurse brushed the hair on my head to the side out of my face as I was wrapped in a baby blue blanket asleep.
“I think I’ll name him Yin” then let out a soft chuckle smiling and looking at me.
“Such a pretty name, welcome to the world, Yiin” everything from then was just a blur, I never knew my parents and never heard of them since I was raised at the orphanage; however the lady who had owned it raised me as if I was her kid, which is why she named me Yin. Before I went to the orphanage she had lost a baby of her own having a miscarriage, her husband had abused her physically which led to the baby not making it the final month before it was time for her to give birth. She had wanted her child to be named after the great yin and yang; I might not have been her blood child but she chose to raise me anyways. I still remember following her as if she was my mother and the other kids teased me saying I was just a pet; it didn’t stop there though, it’s been 10 years since I was left here and I was close to my 11th birthday already.
“I have a little surprise for you Yin” she handed me a small box wrapped in red wrapping paper with a white bow tied around it, it had written To Yin Wu From Ling Wu. “I know it’s a bit early but your birthday is coming up and I wanted to give you something ahead of time.” I opened the present by taking off the bow first then the wrapping paper, I gently opened the box and it was like a small pocket watch but as I opened it had a picture of me and her inside together. I smiled and then hugged her tightly holding onto the watch.
“Thank you, mama,” I said as a smile appeared on her face then hugged me back gently then closing her eyes tears running down her eyes
“Come on now, since everyone is asleep I wanted to give your cake early too” I let go of her as she got up and went to a small freezer that was in the corner behind the front desk of the orphanage. She brought out a tray with around 10 mooncakes for me and her.
“My favorite!” she shushes me chuckling then gets one for me then places it in my hand, I took a bite holding it with two hands as crumbs flew all over.
“My sweet darling ” she placed the tray down beside her on the desk then went back on her knees to look at me better, “Soon, when it’s my time to go, you will need to find your yang. I have taken care of you since you were a baby and I’m not as young as I was back then, so when the time comes, find your yang, and no matter what people say; your yang is someone who loves you with all their heart no matter what they are. I just want you to be happy, my Yin.” Those words have stayed with me ever since then and by the time I hit the age of 17 she passed away, today was the day I got to hold your hand and say I love you one last time. I can still feel your hand on my cheek saying everything will be alright, after every beating from the kids here, after every failure at school, every moment my heart aches. I can still feel you here with me mama, you were my yang…